I want to get non-aerosol mace, you just rub it in. "Dude who is attacking me - come a little closer!" — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
I'm out to take the Bible, create disciples who make disciples, disciple cycles... — LeCrae Copy Share Image
I have NEVER worked with a better lead generating company! Thank You Zillow. — Spencer Rascoff Copy Share Image
Men have to recognize that women are not all the same when it comes to what can get them aroused. — Drew Pinsky Copy Share Image
Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible. — Doug Larson Copy Share Image
I don't think I said a single funny thing in class between 2004 and 2008. — Ivo Graham Copy Share Image
England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
When someone says everything happens for a reason, I'd like to smack them and say, 'Yeah, I guess you're right.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“A philosopher is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that isn't there. A theologian is the… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Sometimes I wonder what my grandfather would think of what I do, he spent his whole life in the kebab business, was… — Milton Jones Copy Share Image
“Awesome." "Awesome squared." "Awesome cubed." "Awesome to the power of infinity." "The square root of awesome is-" "-Asha." We finish at the… — Hannah Harrington Copy Share Image
I was not a big fan of the Attitude Era. Some of the things they did were very good and very funny… — Ted DiBiase Sr Copy Share Image
I will make a joke about any of my family members, about me, about my wife, if I really thought that I'm… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
When men lose against me, they always have a headache ... or things of that kind. I have never beaten a completely… — Susan Polgar Copy Share Image
