Funny Quotes · Page 346

God continues to speak through what He has spoken.

— John Stott

To sleep is an act of faith.

— Barbara Grizzuti Harrison

To understand the truth is to do the truth.

— Jon Sobrino

A true friend remembers your birthday but not your age.

— Anonymous

We have to make ourselves as perfect as we can.

— Sonny Rollins

The unexpected is always likely to happen.

— John Motson

Do you know what's funny about virgina jokes? nothing.

— Shamix

My best training came from my father.

— Woodrow Wilson

If you only knew who you really are, you'd be starstruck

— Victoria Moran

No, I did not want the receipt, but now that you've asked, I'm getting suspicious. So yes please I want it.

— Green Monk

“Step one, accept she was a damn boss. Step two, hide all the knives, guns, and maybe the pillows, too.”

— J.J. McAvoy

We are reluctant to live outside tribal rules because we are afraid of getting kicked out of the tribe.

— Caroline Myss

We do not discard something we know to be true because of something we do not yet understand.

— Neil L. Andersen

By the time an actor knows how to act any sort of part he is often too old to act any but…

— W. Somerset Maugham

There is no reason ever to have the same thought twice, unless you like having that thought.

— David Allen

“Humor is not an end in itself, but a tool to understanding. A dense head must be tickled with an ax.”

— Bauvard

Love is a feeling that is really hard to explain, but its the greatest feeling you could ever have. But love could…

— Green Monk

I love actors, and I love the casting process. It's funny, like, some writers don't like actors because, I think, they are…

— Bryan Fuller

Burning Ants. As a kid: oh, no! the city of Townsville is on Fire! Now: hey! where are you going!? COME AVENGE…

— Nutella Umbrella

“Charley's "FOR THE LOVE OF": “Oh,FOR THE LOVE OF gravy” “Just be honest with me, FOR THE LOVE OF applesauce, Gemma.” “But…

— Darynda Jones

When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, they raised the average intelligence level in both states.

— Will Rogers

High school is neither a democracy nor a dictatorship - nor, contrary to popular belief, an anarchic state. High school is a…

— John Green

The last five years I've really worked on my mental health and seeing a therapist - which, it's so funny cause I…

— Jessica Long

When I hear somebody like Hayes Carll write a song that's touching and poignant and sad and funny all at the same…

— Jason Isbell

The Tao which you know is not the eternal Tao

— Laozi

Now I will have less distraction.

— Leonhard Euler

Let your failures refine you, not define you.

— Max Lucado

It is easier to kill what we do not know.

— Albert Camus

The world is God's world, after all.

— Charles Kingsley

Let us try for once not to be right.

— Tristan Tzara

I thank you for nothing, because I understand nothing.

— John Lyly

My grandmother was very funny. It skipped a generation.

— Richard Belzer

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

— Lewis Black

Breasts like granite and a brain like swiss cheese.

— Billy Wilder

The Left is totalitarian in its nature

— Dennis Prager

Let us spend one day as deliberately as Nature.

— Henry David Thoreau

I'm not even sure If I'm awake now.

— Will Graham

Success depends on our using, and not opposing...

— Thomas Troward

You bet I did and I enjoyed it.

— Michael Bloomberg

I am fundamentally an optimist.

— Nelson Mandela