“Fuck you!” “Right here?” He crossed his arms. “That definitely wouldn’t help your getting over me.” — Stacey Marie Brown Copy Share Image
It's cute the way you ignore the red squiggly line under all of your words. — Psyche_Zeroh Copy Share Image
It is astonishing how elements that seem insoluble become soluble when someone listens. — Carl Rogers Copy Share Image
Everything that's happening to you, is what's suppose to be happening to you. So just relax. — Chris Martin Copy Share Image
One longs to be funny, to make people laugh. Laughter is such a sign of approval, isn't it? — Tom Baker Copy Share Image
Most of the time when people laugh at me...I'm not trying to be funny. — Donny Norris Copy Share Image
I don't want to be the one to break it to you, but the future ain't that funny. — Albert Brooks Copy Share Image
Sometimes if I really want to get someone's attention, I'll start a sentence with something like, "I'm not racist, but..." I say,… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
The time that Ted and I spend talking about our careers is almost infinitesimally small. We mostly talk about our kids and… — Mary Steenburgen Copy Share Image
“Agatha: "If you say anything smug or stuck-up or shallow, I'll have Reaper follow you home." Sophie: "But then I can't talk!” — Soman Chainani Copy Share Image
The animals of a jungle have decided to hold a meeting. The lion has come, the tiger has come, the elephant has… — A Josland Copy Share Image
Dating means doing a lot of fun things you will never do again if you get married. The fun stops with marriage… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
In a Ghetto HouseHold EVERYBODY has a nick name. Tell POOKIE to tell MAN MAN to get PEANUT and stop by COOKIES… — Christian Heggs Copy Share Image
“You've brushed your teeth," He says, staring at me. "I used your toothbrush." His lips quirk up in a half smile. "Oh… — E.L. James Copy Share Image
After 15 years of marriage a wife asked her husband to describe her. The husband looked at her and then said :… — Mike Peters Copy Share Image
