Funny Quotes · Page 246

The greatest risk is to risk nothing at all

— Leo Buscaglia

We mathematicans are all a bit crazy.

— Lev Landau

If life throws you lemons,bring out the TEQUILA!!!

— Punkinhead Abhishek

If he's not dead, it doesn't count.

— Mike Tyson

The money is no better in retirement but the hours are!

— Anonymous

Never start a conversation with a yawn

— Lee Clow

I'm me, and I'm here, and I'm writing,

— Octavia Butler

I would always play the baddie, incidentally.

— Tom Hiddleston

Your point maôm does not contribute any flavor in the juice

— Julia Nkandi

“He was discovered with his feet stuck to the ceiling in the bathroom with his head stuffed in the toilet...”

— Orson Scott Card

You are so much more, than your orientation, you know it and I know it.

— Adam Lambert

Now is the time for us to stop seeking our own satisfaction and to pour out our lives before HIM.

— Oswald Chambers

You swore you wouldn't shout. If it's not your punch, then it's your pout.

— Elvis Costello

“Peace cannot be achieved; they have to be plucked out of their pod.”

— A.G. Phillips

The apostates think that everybody is wrong but themselves.

— Brigham Young

I never consciously set out to talk about taboos or anything like that.

— Roseanne Barr

Love is like a storm.It is calm and soothing.It is natural and essential.It is powerful and fulfilling and nothing can get in…

— Sharlene05

Here goes a joke: Mom Sh**,wat r u sayin boay,Sh** mom,the Sh**,i tried 2 wake up ma sista with a fart but…

— Harvey Mcfield

Children are very overprotected now, in lots of ways. We're very nervous about them. You know, people go, "Don't go outside! Or…

— Dylan Moran

Golden eagles have an interesting way of mating, where they connect in the air while flying at eighty miles an hour and…

— Ellen DeGeneres

When life gives me lemons, I'm like What's the catch? Because in this expensive world no one's just giving away free lemons.

— Nikhil Saluja

It's true that I have spoken about doing a book before, but then everyone you speak to is planning to write a…

— Dylan Moran

Guys, if your jeans are skinnier than mine, it's not happening. P.S. - My gay friend wants to know if you're single.

— Anonymous

Do not let a day go by without taking some time for yourself - some time you spend in pure pleasure, as…

— Napoleon Hill

Every meal is a happy meal when you're starving. . .

— Rick Sutter

I don't bite you know ... unless it's called for,

— Audrey Hepburn

Everybody who's anybody longs to be a tree.

— Rita Dove

Thing I won't forget: How much you meant to me.

— Anonymous

“Life is funny; it really is.”

— Karyn Bosnak

We have to earn our Wings every day.

— Frank Borman

First thing's first I'm the realest,

— Iggy Azalea

Your life belongs to you and you alone.

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Don't talk. I can't hear myself see.

— Jerry Saltz

Its funny how smiling and dying ryhmes..

— Ashley

Life is fullest when we are most true to ourselves.

— Gay Hendricks

I already am, I always was, and I still have time to be

— Anis Mojgani

If you have nothing to say, say nothing.

— Mark Twain

They say, I'm a UNIQUE piece :* Me:- you Bozo :p :D

— Anonymous

Fly and you will catch the swallow.

— James Howell

This is my body. It is no one's but mine.

— Andrea Gibson