Earth Quote by Stephen Colbert

In the beginning, a monkey evolutioned gay marriage.

— Stephen Colbert

“Mr. Charles Darwin, who looked a bit like God which is interesting, wrote a book called You're a Fucking Monkey, Mate. He played around…

— Eddie Izzard

Thank God for Darwin, eh?

— Bill Bailey

“Darwin’s theory, laid out in On the Origin of Species in 1859, suggested that people and apes shared a common ancestor, and, coupled with…

— David Grann

After creating the heaven, the earth, the ocean, and the entire animal kingdom, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said…

— Bill Cosby

It's in the Bible. God created it. He did not create gay marriage. He created man and woman marriage -- duh!

— Victoria Jackson

“When Charles Darwin published On the Origin of Species in 1859, he exposed the world to a momentous discovery . For the first time…

— Jeff Schweitzer

Darwin begins by assuming life upon the earth; the Bible reveals the source of life and chronicles its creation.

— William Jennings Bryan

“Darwin abolished special creations, contributed the Origin of Species and hitched all life together in one unbroken procession.”

— Mark Twain

“God had conceived humans’ heterosexuals; until they start making initiatives.”

— M.F. Moonzajer

God was created by evolution, inside the imagination of a primate.

— Steve Fowler

“Evolution is a part of nature. The world has strayed away from God, and now interprets its conception for the benefit of blissful ignorance.”

— Lionel Suggs