Quote by Jarod Kintz

“Once you realize your worth, you'll stop accepting coupons.”

— Portia A. Cosby

“Normally I charge 60 cents on the dollar for stolen merchandise. But since it was my mother-in-law, and I stole it from her, I…

— Jarod Kintz

“My love is like hooray! Special terms and conditions may apply. See dealer for details. Coupon not valid with any other offer.”

— Jarod Kintz

“I’m wearing the costume of a customer, and it smells cheap. Can you pass me the coupons, please?”

— Jarod Kintz

“Another coupon tacked onto the pile I'll redeem when I get some power in my fucken life. Look around this life and all you…

— D.B.C. Pierre

“You can't put a price tag on human life. But if you could, I'd demand coupons for clones.”

— Jarod Kintz

“I opened my wallet and gave him a coupon, hoping he’d open his wallet and give me money.”

— Jarod Kintz

“I paid her a little visit, and I used a coupon with the purchase.”

— Jarod Kintz

“people always try to impress others with money, but the best gifts in life are always free.”

— Ajay K. Pandey

“I knew things like if you had fifty cents, and you stole a dollar from the slow kid, you had a dollar fifty”

— Mishna Wolff

“50 bucks sounds fair to me. Especially since I’m not doing anything to earn it.”

— Jarod Kintz

“I would have made you a cheesecake, but I don’t know how. And I would have bought you a cheesecake, but I have no…

— Jarod Kintz