Water Quote by Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to flavor your bathtub water, and raise the fluid level, so you perceive that you have more to drink.
”

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to cool your drink, like a large ice cube.
”

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to encourage trees to grow fruitful things like money. If money grew on trees, then I’d get drunk on…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to satisfy your hunger—and satisfy my curiosity.
”

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used as a bottle opener. Just don’t smash down too hard, or you’ll shatter the bottle.
”

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be slid on a wood floor, like a rolling bowling ball, in an attempt to fill the seconds between swallows of…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to crush grapes. If that sounds unnecessarily cruel, then I guess you wouldn’t like to pour you a glass…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to help you maintain a balanced diet, by keeping your head perfectly still with the brick steady on your…

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used to crush the Fruit of Desire and make the Juice of Destiny. Drink it before I lose my erection.
”

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used as a laxative. You know, “Shit a brick.”
”

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used like a Viking skull holds soup. If you bring a spoon, I can quench your thirst—and your hunger. 
”

— Jarod Kintz

“A brick could be used as food for thought. Every politician should chew on that.
”

— Jarod Kintz