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Witty Quotes by Mitch Hedberg
- A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.
- I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you…
- I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.
- I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.
- I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.
- This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.
More Witty Quotes
- Democracy arises out of the notion that those who are equal in any respect are equal in all respects; because men are… — Aristotle
- Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. — Aristotle
- Years ago someone wrote [about me]: 'She characterizes Molly Weasley as a mother who is only at home looking after the children.'… — Joanne Kathleen Rowling
- It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. — Aristotle
- I've no idea where ideas come from and I hope I never find out; it would spoil the excitement for me if… — Joanne Kathleen Rowling
- If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving be me. — Wystan Hugh Auden
- You can choose, you can go one of two ways. You can be the person I probably admire more and say 'well… — Joanne Kathleen Rowling
- I believe in free will. Of those that, like us, are in a privileged situation at least. For you, for me: people… — Joanne Kathleen Rowling