Witty Quotes

2578 quotes by 687 authors

My occupation now, I suppose, is jail inmate. — Theodore Kaczynski
What is perfectly true is perfectly witty. — Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Laugh not too much; the witty man laughs least: For wit is news only to ignorance. Lesse at thine own things laugh; lest in the… — George Herbert
Grave authors say, and witty poets sing, That honest wedlock is a glorious thing. — Alexander Pope
Surrealism in painting amounted to little more than the contents of a meagerly stocked dream world: a few witty fantasies, mostly wet dreams and agoraphobic… — Susan Sontag
I'm not so much interested in the return ON my money as I am in the return OF my money. — Will Rogers
If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there — Will Rogers
Love is the only passion which includes in its dreams the happiness of someone else. — Mary Karr
Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco. — Will Rogers
Letting Go: A Little Bit at a Time is filled with big ideas that just might change your life. Wise, witty, and important. — Daniel Amen
A witty illustration or an apt story will accomplish more than columns of argument. — Chauncey Depew
Most people sitting at home aren't cool, successful, witty Hollywood stars, but they all worry about what people think of them when they faux pas. — Ricky Gervais
When you realize the value of all life, you dwell less on what is past and concentrate more on the preservation of the future. — Dian Fossey
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. — Benjamin Franklin
Money has never made man happy, nor will it, there is nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more of it one has the… — Benjamin Franklin
Creative minds have always been known to survive any kind of bad training. — Anna Freud
If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. — Clement Freud
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. — Robert Frost
Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep… — Robert Frost
A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. — Robert Frost

Who Wrote These Witty Quotes

687 authors contributed a total of 2,578 Witty Quotes, led by these top contributors: