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Guys Quotes by Jack Handey
- I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with…
- If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flipper, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flipper, wouldn't you? You'd be…
- If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while you're in there some guys come and seal up both…
- Despair is like a cable that is buried just under the surface of the ground. You pull it up and pull it up, but that…
- A funny thing is if you're out hiking and your friend gets bit by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going for help, then go…
More Guys Quotes
- Aside from a handful of guys boxing is missing the good trainers, that's why our sport is so in the air now… — Alexis Arguello
- But guys such as Allen and William are more supportive than most men. — Kathy Acker
- I mean, the Constitution of this country was written 200 years ago. The house I was living in in Madrid is 350… — Antonio Banderas
- It was hard to get guys to notice me, period, because I was so skinny and all my friends were curvy. Plus,… — Tyra Banks
- I play Orange County drums. I love those guys. I've got a four piece kit. — Travis Barker
- I say I'm the only serious comedian in the presidential race. And I'd like to take this opportunity to ask both Romney… — Roseanne Barr
- Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated as they are, only… — Dave Barry
- It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This is why it takes… — Dave Barry
- I was one of the hardest-hitting conservatives on George W. Bush. Republicans didn't like me on George W. Bush. Republicans still don't… — Glenn Beck
- I've spent enough time with soldiers to know that once they get to know you and they loosen up and become themselves,… — Peter Berg
- A lot of guys go, 'Hey, Yog, say a Yogi-ism.' I tell 'em, 'I don't know any.' They want me to make… — Yogi Berra
- It's always the small people who change things. It's never the politicians or the big guys. I mean, who pulled down the… — Luc Besson