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Drink Quotes by Jack Handey
- It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.
- If I lived in the Wild West days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That was if some…
- When you go to a party at somebody's house, don't automatically assume that the drinks are free. Ask, and ask often.
- The tired and thirsty prospector threw himself down at the edge of the watering hole and started to drink. But then he looked around and…
- If a kid ever asks you how Santa Claus can live forever, I think a good answer is that he drinks blood.
- Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers…
More Drink Quotes
- High thoughts must have high language. — Aristophanes
- If you have children, you don't want to have drugs and drinks in the house. It's just not good. — Billie Joe Armstrong
- Some books are undeservedly forgotten; none are undeservedly remembered. — Wystan Hugh Auden
- It's frightening how easy it is to commit murder in America. Just a drink too much. I can see myself doing it.… — Wystan Hugh Auden
- I can't drink whiskey like I used to back then, that's for sure. — Sebastian Bach
- Age appears to be best in four things; old wood best to burn, old wine to drink, old friends to trust, and… — Francis Bacon
- I don't have any particular thing I do ritualistically. I do the same thing every day. I get up. Drink a lot… — Erykah Badu
- I drink a bucket of white tea in the morning. I read about this tea of the Emperor of China, which is… — Antonio Banderas
- A drink a day keeps the shrink away. — Edward Abbey
- I juice a lot; I get as much protein as I can, because being a vegan, there isn't much protein. But that's… — Travis Barker
- Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water,… — Dave Barry
- You can only be young once. But you can always be immature. — Dave Barry