"It is better that I drink this beer……" — Jack Handey

More Alcohol Quotes

This quote is filed under Alcohol Quotes, one of 1,156 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

• It is best to rise from life as from a banquet, neither thirsty nor drunken. — Aristotle
• On average, drug prisoners spend more time in federal prison than rapists, who often get out on early release because… — Michael Badnarik
• Drug prohibition has caused gang warfare and other violent crimes by raising the prices of drugs so much that vicious… — Michael Badnarik
• Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to… — Dave Barry
• According to Teenage Research Unlimited, 51 percent of 13-15 year olds say they will be faced with making a decision… — Xavier Becerra
• I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger,… — Brendan Behan
• Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony. — Robert Benchley
• I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered. — George Best
• Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure. — Ambrose Bierce
• The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. — Humphrey Bogart
• Never accept a drink from a urologist. — Erma Bombeck
• Wine is a treacherous friend who you must always be on guard for. — Christian Nestell Bovee

See all 1,156 Alcohol Quotes »