Beer Quotes

1136 Beer quotes by 707 unique authors

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. — Abraham Lincoln
The love of learning, the sequestered nooks, And all the sweet serenity of books. — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on… — Bernie Mac
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. — Dean Martin
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. — Dean Martin
If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt. — Dean Martin
I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up. — Dean Martin
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. — Groucho Marx
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. — Groucho Marx
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. — Groucho Marx
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others. — Groucho Marx
The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass. — Martin Mull
If you guys are going to be throwing beer bottles at us, at least make sure they're full. — Dave Mustaine
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. — Jack Nicholson
The basic thing a man should know is how to change a tyre and how to drive a tractor. Whatever that bearded dude is doing… — Timothy Olyphant
I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy. — Emo Philips
If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he comes next to drinking… — Thomas de Quincey
I don't know what goes on in the crowd. I've had them show up and throw beer cans at me. I caused riots in most… — Lou Reed
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. — Will Rogers
A book is a version of the world. If you do not like it, ignore it; or offer your own version in return. — Salman Rushdie
I learned early to drink beer, wine and whiskey. And I think I was about 5 when I first chewed tobacco. — Babe Ruth
I'm more of a guy's girl. I like having a beer in a bar, and I don't bicker or sit down and do my nails. — Zoe Saldana
Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do. — Jean-Paul Sartre
Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer. — Arnold Schwarzenegger
God has a brown voice, as soft and full as beer. — Anne Sexton

Who Wrote These Beer Quotes

707 authors contributed a total of 1,136 Beer Quotes, led by these top contributors: