I just realized that our fears are bigger than our dreams. — Green Monk Bigger dreams Copy Share Image
Every woman deserves a man who respects her and every man deserves a woman who appreciates his efforts. — Green Monk Every man Copy Share Image
If your friends jumped off a cliff, would you? . . . If my friends jumped off a cliff, it would be… — Green Monk Friendship Copy Share Image
That dress would look awfully nice on the floor next to my bed... — Green Monk Fashion Copy Share Image
I think my baby might be connected to Al-Qaeda the way she blows up her diapers. — Green Monk Al qaeda Copy Share Image
The adult in me wants Vodka, while the kid in me wants Orange Juice. It's a good thing they get along. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
A real man doesn't need a whole lot of women to make him feel like a king, only ONE! The ONE! — Green Monk Feel Copy Share Image
Dear circle, Do you ever wake up in the morning and realize your life is pointless? Sincerely, square. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
My wife is a Bisexual. I have to Buy her things, for her to become Sexual… — Green Monk Bisexual Copy Share Image
I hate how all the cheese comes off in one bite when I'm eating pizza. — Green Monk Cheese Copy Share Image
The Most Dramatic Excuse By A GirL Sorry , I can't go , I fractured an eyelash . — Green Monk Excuse Copy Share Image
Hate when I get drunk at a bar and hot chicks waste the opportunity to take sexual advantage of me. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Any girl can get a facial, but it takes real woman to get bukkake. — Green Monk Facial Copy Share Image
Wish there was a pill I could put in a girl's drink, that would make her do my taxes. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Caring for someone is easy but to make someone care for you is difficult¦ So never lose the one who really cares… — Green Monk Compassion Copy Share Image
Apparently kicking my friend in the chest & yelling THIS IS SPARTA! is not an appropriate response to what do you feel… — Green Monk Friendship Copy Share Image
I hope I live to be 100 if only just to mess with people by telling them fake reasons why I lived… — Green Monk Every day Copy Share Image
I hate when people see me at the supermarket and are like, HEY, what are you doing here? and I'm like, Oh… — Green Monk Animals Copy Share Image
I blame Beauty and the Beast for giving ugly kids confidence & tricking them into thinking that beauty is found on the inside. — Green Monk Beauty Copy Share Image
My friend said I'm childish something something. Couldn't hear the rest cause I had my fingers in my ear & was saying… — Green Monk Friendship Copy Share Image
I always wondered how theres 6 members in my family but theres like 20 tooth brushes… — Green Monk Family Copy Share Image
My granddaughter wanted a Cinderella theme party, so I invited all her friends over and made them clean my house! — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
What are you? My Grammar teacher? Stop correcting my Bed speling! — Green Monk Correcting Copy Share Image
The secret of our marriage is chemistry. She's on Valium and I'm on Prozac — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Keep your friends close and your alcohol closer. Then get drunk and insult your friends. — Green Monk Drunk Copy Share Image
When I was younger I had everything handed to me on a plate... Soup was a nightmare — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
I have enough money to Live comfortably for the rest of my life…...If I die next Tuesday. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
If you don't like me, it's not my fault.. it just means you have no taste! — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Ive always been a big fan of beauty. Sure, you cant judge a book by its cover but who wants to have… — Green Monk Beauty Copy Share Image
Pardon me but I was just about to go home and masturbate and I was wondering if you'd mind if I fantasize… — Green Monk Fantasize Copy Share Image
I'm so sorry, but I have some bad news and a Justin Bierber CD. Which one would you like to hear first? — Green Monk Bad news Copy Share Image
If all else fails, get in bed at 8:00pm and watch a bunch of shit on tv. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
