“Edle Herren, seid so freundlich und verpisst Euch.” — Christopher Moore Christopher-moore Copy Share Image
“there was a flash, a ding, and everything got dark and gooey.” — Christopher Moore Dark Copy Share Image
“Evolution doesn’t really have a destination. It’s just dicking around with possibilities.” — Christopher Moore Biology Copy Share Image
Foul and magical fumes bubbled out of the kettle, like the flatulence of a dragon on a demon-only diet. — Christopher Moore Demon Copy Share Image
“pursuit of material gain is ultimately empty when measured against eternity;” — Christopher Moore Eternity Copy Share Image
Life is loneliness, broken only by the gods taunting us with friendship and the odd bonk — Christopher Moore Broken Copy Share Image
I don't read reviews if I know in advance they're negative, because I can't have my confidence undermined when I'm writing. — Christopher Moore Advance Copy Share Image
“Sophie marched away in rhythm to her new chant, "not in the butt - not in the butt - not in the… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Okey dokey, fire up the blender, let's make a furry-flurry smoothie out of that squirrel!” — Christopher Moore Smoothie Copy Share Image
Which is why you chose to wear that delightful ensemble from the skank-wear collection at Hoes-n-Thangs?" -Tommy — Christopher Moore Collections Copy Share Image
Actually, orcas aren't quite as complex as scientists imagine. Most killer whales are just four tons of doofus dressed up like a… — Christopher Moore Car Copy Share Image
“So I'm all, "Owned! Bee-yatch! Dog fucking owned you!" Doing a minor booty dance of ownage, perhaps, in retrospect, a bit prematurely.… — Christopher Moore Dance Copy Share Image
“You're the one with almost an MBA," Barry, the short balding one, said to Lash. "You should know what to do." "They… — Christopher Moore Humor Copy Share Image
“No theory ever benefited by the application of data, Amy. Data kills theories. A theory has no better time than when it’s… — Christopher Moore Correlation Copy Share Image
“We were seekers. You are that which is sought, Joshua. You are the source. The end is divinity, in the beginning is… — Christopher Moore Inspirational Copy Share Image
“You see, my plan is working. For it is written that ‘if the wise man always appears stupid, his failures do not… — Christopher Moore Fool Copy Share Image
Wet towel under the door,' said Barry. 'It's what you do when you're smoking weed in a hotel and you don't want… — Christopher Moore Calling Copy Share Image
After all the evidence is in--after you've run all the facts by everything you know--and you're still lost, you have to do… — Christopher Moore Evidence Copy Share Image
“Fine, fuck it," Clay said, tossing the plate into the yard. The chicken parts bounced nicely, breading themselves with a light coating… — Christopher Moore Cell phone Copy Share Image
“Lash had been explaining to her that it's impolite to refer to an African American as a nigga, unless one was another… — Christopher Moore African american Copy Share Image
“No, inaction. Contemplation. Steadiness. Conservatism. A wall is the defense of a country that values inaction. But a wall imprisons the people… — Christopher Moore Inaction Copy Share Image
“I said,” said Lear, “most pernicious monstress, perfect in her perfidy!” Kent mimed a set of generous bosoms on himself and raised… — Christopher Moore Boobs Shrugged Copy Share Image
“The hip-hop guy nodded curtly, like he knew that, and despite appearances to the contrary, he had not been trippin', but had,… — Christopher Moore Chillin Like Copy Share Image
“Tommy had completely forgotten that he was horny. He had always been horny, and had accepted that he always would be horny.… — Christopher Moore Horny Copy Share Image
“I was all, "Oh, dog, Countess gonna crack open a forty of whup-ass on you now. Oh, you in the sh*t now,… — Christopher Moore Christopher-moore Copy Share Image
“In another Christmas story, Dale Pearson, evil developer, self-absorbed woman hater, and seemingly unredeemable curmudgeon, might be visited in the night by… — Christopher Moore Bastard Copy Share Image
“A question asked in earnest deserves an earnest answer.” — Christopher Moore Question Asked Copy Share Image
Only by being prepared for your death can you ever truly live. — Christopher Moore Death Copy Share Image
