There is a new survey out about the happiest professions. I think the whole premise is flawed. You're supposed to find true… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
I've been running my whole life. Running into bars, running around the world. But when you have a child, you can't run.… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
The whole idea of re-releasing old movies does bother me a little bit. If they're going to re-release an old movie, I… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
You know, your whole life you're concerned about money for this and that. And then you don't have to worry about it,… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
I don't like the whole blowing the candles out ritual... blowing their germs all over the cake. If I want to catch… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
“I was ambitious and desperate to direct my first film, so I capitulated and blew it. Never again. Never fucking again.” — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
Sometimes people think you’re smart if you question the status quo, if nothing else. — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
Sober alkies are often asked: "When did you hit rock bottom?" but a more informed question might be: "How many times did you hit… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
Remember the band, Flock of Seagulls? They had their van stolen. I was like, They still have a van? — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
People spend thousands of dollars trying to keep their teeth straight. I just hope we can live in a world where we accept gay… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
People are saying that Anderson Cooper could be the new Oprah. And then these people are struck by lightning. — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
I think comedy comes more from a low sense of self-esteem, and I certainly have that. — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
For my birthday that year Anne gave me an inflatable atlas globe, along with a birthday card in which she wrote: I give you… — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
