You think that sense of humor goes as far as our ideology. I think that ultimately, we have we have very interesting… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Jazz musicians are the coolest people on the planet. Can I have some cool? — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Maybe we should always show pictures. Bin Laden, pictures of our wounded service people, pictures of maimed innocent civilians. We can only… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Scores of Iraqi exiles met in London to discuss ways to overthrow Saddam Hussein in a grand gathering dubbed the 'Iraqi Military… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
People would like to place a standard on our show that doesn't exist. We're not set up for reporting; we don't have… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Most world religions denounced war as a barbaric waste of human life. We treasured the teachings of these religions so dearly that… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
North Korea is making several demands in exchange for giving up their nuclear program, including a promise from America not to attack… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
And then you've got Lieberman, who is for the war. And thinks the tax cuts could really help. He's basically for people… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I thinking gay and straight people use the same putters, it's not a matter of putters but a matter of hole selection. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I think people are used to people in show business having a lot of hubris. I think I have a normal amount… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
People, if you can't get through the puns, I can't give you the good stuff. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
They may want to insist that corporations are people but corporations are certainly not Americans. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The Jews celebrate Passover by eating unpalatable food to remind them what will happen to their people if they ever leave New… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
It's very hard to feel the difficulties that the military goes through. It's very hard to feel the difficulties of military families,… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
It's the same argument people say about the blogs. The blogs are responsible. No, they're not. The blogs are like anything else.… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I'll tell you this: Religion is far more of a choice than homosexuality. And the protections that we have, for religion -we… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
No matter what your race, creed or sexual preference, there is a word that people use to describe you that is very… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The reason I don’t worry about society is, nineteen people knocked down two buildings and killed thousands. Hundreds of people ran into… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
If America leads a blessed life, then why did God put all of our oil under people who hate us? — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The wisdom of the masses is not always wise. You could put a lot of things to a vote-you could have put… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I feel like the only thing that I can do, and I've been fired from enough jobs, that I'm pretty confident in… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't know how people feel,that's the beauty of TV, is they can see us, but we can't see them. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I reject the idea there are just two sides. I think that with the amount of ideas and thoughts there are, it's not even… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
While opponents label (Howard) Dean a throwback liberal, The New York Times recently noted that as governor, Dean cut income taxes, reformed welfare and… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You know, in Saudi Arabia, you're innocent until proven Jewish. Female. Guilty! They're guilty! — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is an elective. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Do you guys have to sell everything? I'd like to buy the Earth's core. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates the use of 's.'… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
