With humor you have so many options with topics and length, I mean I can write humor essays in books now and… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Actually, there are people from all ove - not just Latin America, certainly not just Cuba, but all over Europe, all over… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Because of some defect in my motor skill, I can never COMPLETELY wrap [gifts]....If I had been an ancient Egyptian in the… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
It's a real smug self-righteous punk kid saying nobody has the right to tell him what to do and how dare you… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I can't recall a story that played out exactly as I'd expected it to. That's one of the thrills of journalism -… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I have found that I can… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I got a lot of mail from organizations concerned with bike safety. Then I got a couple from people who wanted my… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Thanks to my solid academic training, today I can write hundreds of words on virtually any topic without possessing a shred of… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Now, once again, we find ourselves facing rising gas prices, and the question is: This time, are we going to learn from… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I love the resource of the Internet. I use it all the time. Anything I'm writing - for example, if I'm writing… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
A small deer came into my camp and stole my bag of pickles. Is there a way I can get reimbursed? Please… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
![“Because of some defect in my motor skill, I can never COMPLETELY wrap [gifts]....If I had been an ancient Egyptian in the field of mummies, the lower half of the Pharaoh's body would be covered only by scotch tape.” quote by Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/9a8/dave-barry-222_ancient_because-of-some-defect-in-my-motor-skill_962767.jpg)
