“Adelina knew perfectly well who the father was, but she worked hard to forget it, and by the end of her life… — Olga Núñez Miret Copy Share Image
A programming language that is sort of like Pascal except more like assembly except that it isn't very much like either one,… — Raymond Simard Copy Share Image
Today's toys contain computer chips, so they can move and talk; this stimulates the mind of your child. Notice I say "your… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“The worst thing about the dead rising? (Other than, you know, all the zombies?) The smell. Nothing kills the mood like the… — Shawn Durnin Copy Share Image
“... It wasn't my finest moment, but I rolled my eyes and actually huffed. "Fine, don't answer. I don't even know why… — Penny Reid Copy Share Image
“Now, tomorrow Miss Laurie McCrae and me, we have an appointment with a sky pilot who will make it proper for us… — Louis L'Amour Copy Share Image
The Olympic movement simply cannot allow the Russians to become estranged, because Russia is a vital part of the world sports community,… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“To ask a man whether or not he has a girlfriend is to talk about his sex life. If you disagree with… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“You know, there are several gay men on the faculty. Professor Montag makes jelly beans look colorless(...)” — Tara Lain Copy Share Image
“Nancy Herman, my new gym partner and locker neighbor, puts her hand on my shoulder and whispers, "Don't worry April. I have… — Amy Holder Copy Share Image
There are very few things that I have any patience for that are not at least a little bit humorous. — Elif Batuman Copy Share Image
On summer evenings, when every flower, and tree, and bird, might have better addressed my soft young heart, I have in my… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
You wonder if God doesn't have an answering machine to screen out the prayers of the venal and the boring? And in… — Tom Robbins Copy Share Image
“As we all know, as if forever exploiting or attempting to exploit each other were not enough, a group of sane human… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Behind every humorist who delights in knifing hypocrites is a major self-critic.” — Wendy Aron Copy Share Image
“I decided right then and there to make a snickerdoodle perfume to wear, so that one day he would sniff me like… — Jessica Verday Copy Share Image
Standing in a garage no more makes you a car than standing in a church makes you a Christian. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“Doubt is a lot like faith; A mustard's seed worth changes everything.” — Donna Johnson Copy Share Image
The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology. Until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
