“I do not go to church. I don’t go to Christian church or Jew church or any other church. I don’t go… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I don't watch that much comedy. I think it's professional jealousy. That and a lack of support for my community. — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
“Why does Lewis Black have so much hatred for goodness? I do not know. Because I am not a trained psychologist, I… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
“If they have to drag some of you fucking fuckers out of here in body bags, I will be so fucking stoked.” — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
There's this misconception that comedy and music go together. They don't. Comedians can't compete with rock stars; they're just not on the… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
“The truth is I feel bad about calling you a whore. I don't know anything about your personal life; my judgment was… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I thought I'd be living a much more bohemian life and be very poor. I never thought I'd do comedy or be… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
Many, many people can write books. I just happen to be one of them. — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
“I do not go to church. I don’t go to Christian church or Jew church or any other church. I don’t go to church… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
My process is surprisingly straightforward. I find myself with little to do over a stretch of time and I say, "I should write children's… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
“If I have any faith at all, I guess that's it. Faith in the small love that keeps our family together.” — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
Whatever expectations I had for myself, none of them have come to pass. I grew up thinking I was going to be an actor,… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
You have to lead, in the case of a game show, a contestant through the architecture of the show. So there's a lot of… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I can be a snarky Asshole, or I can be sort of mentally impaired. It's very hard for me to just be normal human… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
By the end of the time I'm writing a book, I'm tearing my hair out and I want to go do stand-up. And then… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
Kids love to be silly, they love to laugh, so I think it was natural for my kids to like the sort of books… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
I am a poker player, but I am not a good poker player. My favorite game is seven card stud, but I'll play hi/lo,… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
When you're writing something, and you're putting yourself out there, or you're performing and someone comes in and savages that, then of course it… — Michael Ian Black Copy Share Image
