Relationships are a lot like Algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y? — Scarlet Kim Copy Share Image
For the 5th time: I don't wanna come to your cat's birthday party Freak! My dog is getting married that day! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I like to put things back where I got them from when I am done using them...so I dropped your mom off… — Carlin Whisler Copy Share Image
A spouse is someone who'll stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn't have had if you'd stayed single. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Remember when she cancels a date she has to. But...when he cancels a date he has two. — Danish Copy Share Image
At the eye doctor...Doctor: Please read the lowest line you can. Me: Made in China. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it's… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
HUSBAND, TRADITIONAL, A man who expects his wife to help him with the dishes — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
911 operator what's your emergency Are ya'll hiring? follow me on FACEBOOK ; Dee Rackedd Upp II — Derrick Bey Copy Share Image
I always lock my front door before I get in the shower 'cause if a killer broke in & heard me singing… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Best of luck not getting murdered by the roommate you found on Craigslist. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If there was a black character in Clue, the game would be called Solved. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If I know the person talks a lot I avoid using these words: 1) Really? 2) Please explain! 3) Hello. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Makes me laugh how every rapper goes around sayin things like, I fucked yo bitch....umm since when was getting sloppy seconds a… — Brian Zilinek Copy Share Image
Me jealous Hahahahahahahahaahahaahaahahahahahhahahahahaahahaahahaahah lmao — Kevin McCarty Copy Share Image
