Instagram: Because even ugly & fat girls wanna feel like models sometimes. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
How about this, you remove Funny/Model from your bio and let me be the judge of that. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You know you've drank too much when you actually ask your wife to drive you home. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
She wanted to sign up as an organ donor, but all she had was a guitar. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Oh, you're an actor??? Why don't you act like a waiter and get me another beer. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If the world was run by women, it would be mostly peaceful with heated arguments every 28 days. — Alec Straub Copy Share Image
He'll never be better than he is on the first date. Unless he's rich and hasn't told you yet. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I want to go on a shopping trip where I am the only one in the shopping mall and everything I want… — Mee Copy Share Image
I'll go to great lengths to scavenge other devices for batteries, before I will go out to buy new ones. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter of civilization — Hussein Nishah Copy Share Image
When you're home alone and you hear a strange noise & you're just like - _ - WTF! WHO'S THERE?! — Itsme867 Copy Share Image
Girl's Life Lesson 1: Crying confuses men. They get uncomfortable and will do anything to get it to stop. Take advantage. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
This ho says boy I got high heels bigger than your dick, sikee reply bitch I got sneakers fresher than your Pussy... — Kevin Mccarty Copy Share Image
Sometimes I like to glew my thumbs to my nipples and pretend I'm a T-rex. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Regarding the Boy Scouts, I'm very suspicious of any organization that has a handbook. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Self-Checkout lanes were invented by a guy who was sent out to buy tampons. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Teen pregnancy will be at a all time low due to the releasing of Black Ops 2 & Halo 4. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Why don't blind people sky dive? Because it scares the hell out of their dogs! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
People use YOLO for everything *falls out of tree* are you ok? yeah nigga YOLO. — Itsateenthing Copy Share Image
Dear haters, I'm gonna give you more reason to hate me. Have patience. — Tanya Bianco Copy Share Image
I always write 'Wake Up' on my To-Do-List so I can at least accomplish one thing a day. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Sometimes when my internet is down I forget the rest of my computer still works… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
