If you're Talking behind my back that just means my life is obviously more interesting than yours. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Why the hell do banks have chains on their pens? if I'm trusting you with my money, you should be able to… — Charlie Knapp Copy Share Image
If you're a person who says Only God can judge me on a regular basis, people are actually judging you a lot… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The Monistat people should use Tony Orlando's song Candida for their commercials. — Laura S Copy Share Image
The next person who says, Its not the heat, its the humidity will learn that its not my fist, but the impact. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Hey Customer Service - Instead of monitoring this call for quality purposes, how about you just listen to what I need and… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Algebra stop trying to get us to find your x shes never coming back. And don't even think about asking y. — Mario Tomasello Copy Share Image
Sometimes I'm just a sorry away from you. You can simply apologize and hold paitence meanwhile it gets me some time to… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Facebook needs a In a relationship with ______ while I'm flirting with ______ while I still have feelings for ______ while I'm fucking ______ button.. Smh. — Emilio Vasquez Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and wanted to say,'Thanks for all the things I saw when you… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Oh.. so your dating my ex? i ate a sandwhich earlier. do you want those leftovers too? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Leo and she's a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My girl asked me to do something to make her feel special...I bought that b*tch a wheelchair. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Your manhood is not a license. Her curves are not an excuse. Challenge the stereotype. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
