NASCAR : The most exciting sport for people who have never seen a fucking freeway. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I love how when my soap runs out in the shower, my shampoo magically transforms into body wash. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The government may force me to have health insurance but they can never force me to respect my body. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
LKG girl & boy Boy: Can I kiss ur hand.. . . Girl: why?? Are my lips poisonous? . . Boy: Oh… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I wonder if tap dancers walk into a room, look at a floor and think, 'I'd so tap that.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Don't Take It Seriously * When the DOCTOR says, Take off your clothes. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You know the acronym behind your name won't keep me from kicking your ass in the parking lot. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Vodka-$19.99. Motel-$54.99. Condoms-$2.99. Finding Out She Swallows... PRICELESS!!!!! Fuck Visa, It Pays To Discover!!!!! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Congratulations!! You are the 100th person to view my status. To see your prize please click Control + W. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Facebook should have some kind of limit on the number of times that people can change their relationship statuses. After five or… — Ryan Swain Copy Share Image
Ultimate lazy moment: Watching the sunrise on TV because you're too lazy to get up and watch it for real — Hussein Nishah Copy Share Image
I don't get nervous if I'm surrounded by beautiful women. I know they're all too busy hating each other to notice me. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
