“If I keep sampling the goods like this my ass is going to grow another cheek to make room for all the… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“a shirt that said “Sure you can date my daughter. In a completely unrelated topic, have you seen my shotgun?” — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Jenny can still suck a golf ball through a garden hose and she guns my cock like a champ since she misplaced… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“I want to reach in my pants, pull out my virginity, wrap it up and put a bow on it. Or maybe… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Liz asked me the other day what I thought about twice baked potatoes. How the fuck should I know? Was I supposed… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“And tell me you didn't take him out in public today with that shirt on." We both look at Gavin's shirt that… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Could you stand still please?' Sylvia says in an irritated voice. If she had sweaty balls and an almost-boner she wouldn't be… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Wow, she doesn't have any bones. Like, at all. Where the f*ck are her bones? Am I still drunk? Did I sleep… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Trojan, Durex, Lifestyles, Trojan Magnum (oh yeah, my three foot cock definitely needed those), Contempo, Vivid and Rough Rider. Seriously? There was… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Oh fuck, he was right there. I was wet as hell and he could probably smell me now. I should have eaten… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“I'm sorry, but why does Claire know how to take a punch? I'm not sure I like where this is going," Carter… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Are you really going back there with me?" I ask. "Hell yes I am. Your wish is finally coming true. I will see your… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“I just wanted to hear him speak again. His voice made me want to take my pants off.” — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“It’s totally fine,” I explained to Liz as she paced back and forth behind the couch. “She’s totally housebroken. She’ll go to the door… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do, watcha gonna do when they cut your wiener,” Gavin sang as he pointed his gun at random… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“If I keep sampling the goods like this my ass is going to grow another cheek to make room for all the fat.” — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“He picks up one of the tests and pretends like he's Harry Potter, aiming the test at random objects around the small bathroom yelling,… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“It's going down, and it's going down right the fuck now. I don’t care if there is a room full of witnesses” — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“Dude, he put ass cream on his face. You do know I’m going to have to start calling your son Ass Face now, right?”… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“I'm going to put corn and hot sauce on your wiener, and then I'll hit you in the face with it. Hit you in… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“I have a dream. And in this dream I’m under the covers in bed, just a few scant inches away from Carter’s body. I… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“Everett was wrong when he said nothing will change between us. This moment, right here…it changes everything . And it’s about damn time.” — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“I love you more than a hooker loves free VD testing day at the clinic," she told me drunkenly.” — Tara Sivec Copy Share
“Liz asked me the other day what I thought about twice baked potatoes. How the fuck should I know? Was I supposed to be… — Tara Sivec Copy Share
