We're not too young for love, just too young for about everything there is that goes with love. — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
After many years of studying my Geography book I finally know by heart that Australia is on page 23. — Eliza Brittany Lawn Copy Share Image
I may be crazy, funny,random, and slightly insane.. but u gotta love me :D — Paul Emmanuel Copy Share Image
It's funny, sometimes life just comes down to bringing a little bit of light to somebody when you can. — Derek Trucks Copy Share Image
If opinions are like assholes, then a lot of opinions wear Ed Hardy shirts. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The son of a b!tch moment when you're walking around the house in socks and you step on awet spot. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Since so many people these days don't seem to start their families until around age forty, I predict there will be less… — Sarah Silverman Copy Share Image
I now know Im psychic, because every time I go see a fortune teller, I know everything she says will be absolute… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's really funny how I've come round to classical music around the back door with my banjo in my hand, and I… — Rhiannon Giddens Copy Share Image
I went to my son's graduation this weekend, and I heard a great quote I've never heard before from Albert Einstein. It… — Hamilton Jordan Copy Share Image
If you're not going to give a smile, you can not, some lukewarm, if it is not possible to hear a joke!… — Mak_786 Copy Share Image
People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they don't want it. — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
“I think it's fair to say most video games let players experience only eight emotions: anger, panic, dread, surprise, wonder, satisfaction, joy… — Scott Rogers Copy Share Image
They could take sesame seeds off the market and I wouldn't even care. I can't imagine 5 years from now saying, "Remember… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
It’s simply doing what you’re supposed to do as well as you can when you’re supposed to do it. — Mike Krzyzewski Copy Share Image
You know the other person is bored of texting when they say 'lol' when you weren't being funny. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Its not the next day until I go to sleep and wake up , unless its my b day or Christmas. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I have come to the conclusion that dryer lint is the cremated remains of all of my missing socks. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There are a lot of books showing on how to live longer, but none on why. — Vikrant Parsai Copy Share Image
Who am I? What will I be? Why am I here? Where am I going? — Constantin Stanislavski Copy Share Image
Cram nailed his colours to the mast and threw down the Great Pretender — Ron Pickering Copy Share Image
A Christian isn't necessarily any nicer than anybody else, just better informed. — Frederick Buechner Copy Share Image
Although always prepared for martyrdom, I preferred that it should be postponed. — Winston Churchill Copy Share Image
I love doing stuff with Todd Barry and Jon Benjamin. We give the stage to good bands and funny people. — David Cross Copy Share Image
Facebook's timeline is my favorite way to watch girls from high school get fat. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“He made my truth light and funny without diminishing the importance of it.” — Tarryn Fisher Copy Share Image
Do you like to dance? Well then, could you go dance so I can talk to your friend? — Karan Copy Share Image
They say they're plenty of fish in the sea, but then again I'm a pretty bad fisherman. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
