Funny Quote by Tom Althouse

“I'm hungry enough that I started to salivate at the sight of lettuce. I repeat: lettuce.”

— A.J. Jacobs

“Let there be another lettuce!”

— Terry Pratchett

What did the carrot say to the wheat? Lettuce rest, I'm feeling beet.

— Shel Silverstein

I relish the fact that you've mustard the strength to ketchup to me.

— Nikhil Saluja

“I saw a woman wearing suspicious lettuce!”

— Lemony Snicket

Baloney fudging mustard!

— John Cena

“Lettuce is too Flat”

— Mary Rayner

“If my nipples lactated mustard, I’d wear a bra made out of two hamburger buns.”

— Jarod Kintz

“So I sat at the kitchen table chopping the “holy trinity” of Creole cuisine—bell peppers, celery, and onions—”

— Rysa Walker

“donut can give you the kind of hug from inside that celery just can’t muster.”

— Jen Lancaster

I believe mustard to be one of the most amazing condiments.

— Justin Timberlake

“who cared about the lettuce when the beef was being devoured?”

— Neal Shusterman