Bars Quote by Mitch Hedberg

I want to make a vending machine that sells vending machines. It'd have to be real big.

— Mitch Hedberg

I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at the store, oftentimes I will drop…

— Mitch Hedberg

I like it when you reach into a vending machine to grab your candy bar, and that flap goes up to block you from…

— Mitch Hedberg

I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall.

— Mitch Hedberg

If you come into my house, it looks like I went to Costco and Dylan's Candy and every candy store and I just have…

— Camille Grammer

Has found his/her favorite machine at the gym: the vending machine!

— Ritu Ghatourey

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

— Caroline Rhea

Those prizes in Cracker Jacks are a joke. I once got a magnifying glass. It was so poorly made, ants were laughing at it.

— Scott Roeben

Im gonna take this (object), shine it up real nice, turn it side ways, and stick it straight up your candy ass!

— The Rock

I'm building a glass pyramid over the Egyptian escalator where my body will be mummified, so my customers can come and see me forever.

— Mohamed Al-Fayed

We love to collect vintage glassware that we find at thrift shops, as well as different shapes of cocktail shakers. They are functional and…

— Tom Sandoval

I went [to Hobby Lobby] this morning and bought the cutest little wicker basket to hold all my morning-after pills.

— Cecily Strong