Skip to content

Constitution Quote by Dave Barry

“The primary function of the government is - and here…” quote by Dave Barry — Download Open image

“The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitution - to spew out paper.”

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 2.5 out of 5 (6 ratings)

Constitution Government Politics

More by Dave Barry

This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat…

Image

This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes…

Image

The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That…

Image

The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.

Image

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.

Image

Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary…

Image

He was distracted by a giggle, and turned to see a rare sight: a girl.

Image

The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice.

Image

If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things…

Image

Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you…

Image

“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people…

Image

Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money.

Image

Explore all 867 Dave Barry quotes

More Constitution quotes

Next came the Patent laws. These began in England in 1624; and, in this country, with the adoption of our constitution. Before then [these?],…

Abraham Lincoln

Image

“In American terms, the accomplishment of Genghis Khan might be understood if the United States, instead of being created by a group of educated…

Jack Weatherford

Image

In this choice of inheritance we have given to our frame of polity the image of a relation in blood; binding up the constitution…

Image

As for doing good; that is one of the professions which is full. Moreover I have tried it fairly and, strange as it may…

Henry David Thoreau

Image

While not widely reported, our victories in Iraq are plentiful. National elections, a democratic parliament and the drafting of a constitution are just some…

Image

There is not a revolution that succe Women are suffering because they are being excluded. The high military council excluded women from the committee…

Nawal El Saadawi

Image

Free government is founded in jealousy, and not in confidence; it is jealousy, and not confidence, which prescribes limited constitutions, to bind down those…

Thomas Jefferson

Image

The American Constitution declares 'All men are born equal.' The British Socialist Party add: 'All men must be kept equal'.

Winston Churchill

Image

The Constitution is very clear on the - on the declaration of war or reacting to international crimes - crimes against nations. It is…

Image

Nothing from man's hands, nor law, nor constitution, can be final. Truth alone is final.

Image

“I am apprehensive, Sir, that in the warmth of my feelings, I may have uttered expressions, which were too vehement. If such has been…

Alexander Hamilton

Image

If you try to come into our state and force our businesses to collect a sales tax in manner that violates our laws or…

Image

Browse all 3,334 Constitution quotes