« All You Quotes · W.C. Fields's Page
You Quotes by W.C. Fields
- If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.
- Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
- You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
- If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.
- It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
- Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
- Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.
- Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.
- Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
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