"Never try to impress a woman, because if……" — W.C. Fields
"Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life."
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W.C. Fields
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188 Quotes by W.C. Fields
W.C. Fields has 188 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It…
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The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother.
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Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious…
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I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
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I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
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How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon…
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Variant: I was driven to drink by a woman. I am forever grateful, yet I never had the good manners…
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Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy…
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I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
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All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
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I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and…
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Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
See all 188 quotes by W.C. Fields »
More Expect Quotes
This quote is filed under Expect Quotes,
one of 4,103 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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This is the precept by which I have lived: Prepare for the worst; expect the best; and take what comes.
— Hannah Arendt
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Tourism is a crucial industry that could employ millions of Filipinos, skilled and unskilled alike, cross those 7,107 islands of…
— Benigno Aquino III
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I don't believe in personal immortality; the only way I expect to have some version of such a thing is…
— Isaac Asimov
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We always expect tremendous criticism. It is my role to be the lightning rod ... to attract the attacks against…
— Julian Assange
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Oh, the most important thing about myself is that my life has been full of changes. Therefore, when I observe…
— Chinua Achebe
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In order to win, you must expect to win.
— Richard Bach
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When you are running for the presidency of the United States, you have to expect that you are going to…
— Michele Bachmann
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He that will not apply new remedies must expect new evils; for time is the greatest innovator.
— Francis Bacon
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If you expect the blessings of God, be kind to His people.
— Abu Bakr
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You can't expect someone born into a family with no music... to understand when I'm conducting the Schoenberg Variations.
— Daniel Barenboim
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I want people to be blown away when I do what they don't expect.
— Drew Barrymore
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To think straight, it is advisable to expect all qualities and attributes, adjectives, and so on to refer to at…
— Gregory Bateson
See all 4,103 Expect Quotes »