Witty Quotes

2578 quotes by 687 authors

He treats me like the dirt under my feet. — Samuel Goldwyn
I want to make a picture about the Russian secret police - the GOP. — Samuel Goldwyn
Let's bring it up to date with some snappy nineteenth century dialogue. — Samuel Goldwyn
There is a statue of limitation. — Samuel Goldwyn
This makes me so sore it gets my dandruff up. — Samuel Goldwyn
Keep a stiff upper chin. — Samuel Goldwyn
Gentlemen, listen to me slowly. — Samuel Goldwyn
To hell with the cost, if it's a good story, I'll make it. — Samuel Goldwyn
Put it out of your mind. In no time, it will be a forgotten memory. — Samuel Goldwyn
It's much simpler to be tortured on camera or to be filmed losing your mind. Whereas a script that has characters who are honest, witty… — Ellen Page
If there's ever a woman who's smart, funny, or witty, people are afraid of that, so they don't write that. They only write parts for… — Teri Garr
A rollicking good read-THE HUNTER is steampunk with a Wild West feel. Theresa Meyers is an entertaining and witty writer with a fresh, new voice… — Yasmine Galenorn
I get the impression the English kings were witty, for some reason. I feel like all you had was your wit. — Colin Quinn
Because they're stupid, that's why. That's why everybody does everything. — Homer
You know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have to read the manual and press the right button. — Homer
You know those balls that they put on car antennas so you can find them in the parking lot? Those should be on every car! — Homer
Now what is a wedding? Well, Webster's dictionary describes a wedding as the process of removing weeds from one's garden. — Homer
I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are. — Homer
When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces...I just know they're about to jab me with something. — Homer
It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day. — Homer

Who Wrote These Witty Quotes

687 authors contributed a total of 2,578 Witty Quotes, led by these top contributors: