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Running Quotes by Jack Handey
- One thing vampire children are taught is, never run with a wooden stake.
- I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate revolver. And since he is so busy, you'd probably have to run up…
- When Armageddon comes, it would be good to be an Olympic athlete, because running real fast and jumping over stuff could come in handy.
- If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man,…
- I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make someone run out with potato salad in his…
- It makes me mad when people say I turned and ran like a scared rabbit. Maybe it was like an angry rabbit, who was running…
- I think a good way to get into a movie is to show up where they're making the movie, then stick a big cactus plant…
- I guess the hard thing for a lot of people to accept is why God would allow me to go running through their yards, yelling…
- The sound of fresh rain run-off splashing from the roof reminded me of the sound of urine splashing into a filthy Texaco latrine.
- I'm not afraid of insects taking over the world, and you know why? It would take about a billion ants just to AIM a gun…
- Too bad when I was a kid there wasn't a guy in our class that everybody called the "Cricket Boy", because I would have liked…
More Running Quotes
- I'm hoping someday that some kid, black or white, will hit more home runs than myself. Whoever it is, I'd be pulling… — Hank Aaron
- I have nothing against 3-D in theory. But I've also never run to the movies because something's in 3-D. — J. J. Abrams
- To run away from trouble is a form of cowardice and, while it is true that the suicide braves death, he does… — Aristotle
- I exercise everyday. I swim, I bike, I run and I go to the gym. — Lance Armstrong
- I believe that every human has a finite number of heartbeats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing… — Neil Armstrong
- I don't run a car, have never run a car. I could say that this is because I have this extremely tender… — David Attenborough
- We thought we were running away from the grownups, and now we are the grownups. — Margaret Atwood
- Almost all of our relationships begin and most of them continue as forms of mutual exploitation, a mental or physical barter, to… — Wystan Hugh Auden
- Let not your mind run on what you lack as much as on what you have already. — Marcus Aurelius
- We ought to do good to others as simply as a horse runs, or a bee makes honey, or a vine bears… — Marcus Aurelius
- The tree that is beside the running water is fresher and gives more fruit. — Teresa of Avila
- If you look at the themes that he struck from the minute he started running for president through today, there is a… — David Axelrod