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Might Quotes by Jack Handey
- Fear can sometimes be a useful emotion. For instance, let's say you're an astronaut on the moon and you fear that your partner has been…
- Here's a good thing to do if you go to a party and you don't know anybody: First take out the garbage. Then go around…
- I hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its eggs in my brain, because later you might think you're having…
- If I ever opened a trampoline store, I don't think I'd call it Trampo-Land, because you might think it was a store for tramps, which…
- Sometimes you have to be careful when selecting a new nickname for yourself. For instance, let's say you have chosen the nickname "Fly Head". Normally,…
- To us, it might look like just a rag. But to the brave, embattled men of the fort, it was more than that. It was…
- When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but…
- It's not good to let any kid near a container that has a skull and crossbones on it, because there might be a skeleton costume…
- Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you're coming home, his face might burn up.
- Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway;…
- Any man, in the right situation, is capable of murder. But not any man is capable of being a good camper. So, murder and camping…
- Why do there have to be rules for everything? It's gotten to the point that rules dominate just about every aspect of our lives. In…
- If you want to be the popular one at a party, here's a good thing to do: Go up to some people who are talking…
- Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers…
More Might Quotes
- Total loyalty is possible only when fidelity is emptied of all concrete content, from which changes of mind might naturally arise. — Hannah Arendt
- When it comes to the point where you occasionally look forward to being in prison on the basis that you might be… — Julian Assange
- I write the paragraph, then I'm crossing out, changing words, trying to improve it. When it seems more or less OK, then… — Paul Auster
- It is by not always thinking of yourself, if you can manage it, that you might somehow be happy. Until you make… — Richard Bach
- People are so damned afraid that one day they might wake up and discover that they've grown old. — Billie Joe Armstrong
- To insult someone we call him 'bestial. For deliberate cruelty and nature, 'human' might be the greater insult. — Isaac Asimov
- Lord, grant that I might not so much seek to be loved as to love. — Francis of Assisi
- People are smarter than you might think. — John Astin
- I mean, it is an extraordinary thing that a large proportion of your country and my country, of the citizens, never see… — David Attenborough
- Once you allow yourself to identify with the people in a story, then you might begin to see yourself in that story… — Chinua Achebe
- Never pray for justice, because you might get some. — Margaret Atwood
- My mind withdrew its thoughts from experience, extracting itself from the contradictory throng of sensuous images, that it might find out what… — Saint Augustine