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Guy Quotes by Mitch Hedberg
- Foosball screwed up my perception of soccer. I though you had to kick the ball and then spin around and around. I can't do a…
- I went to a restaurant, and I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket, eating a hamburger, drinking a glass of milk. I said, "Dude,…
- I love my fed-ex guy cause he's a drug dealer and he don't even know it...and he's always on time.
- I played golf... I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying...
- Say, I was on The Craig Kilbourne Show and the next day I flew to Minneapolis. I was at the airport and a guy came…
- One time a guy handed me a picture. He said, 'Here's a picture of me when I was younger.' Every picture is of you when…
- If you boat a lot, you're known as a boating enthusiast. I like to boat, but I just don't want to ever be referred to…
- I want to be a race car passenger: just a guy who bugs the driver. Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should…
- I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, 'You're gonna have to move, you're blocking…
- Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget…
More Guy Quotes
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- Aside from a handful of guys boxing is missing the good trainers, that's why our sport is so in the air now… — Alexis Arguello
- I just let the work speak for itself. An actor is not afraid to take risks; to put on different hats; to… — Kevin Bacon
- What four realms? (Amanda) Time, space, earth, and dreams. (Talon) Okay, now that is scary. Some of you guys walk through time?… — Sherrilyn Kenyon
- Saw some really bad porn said no guy ever. — Nikhil Saluja
- A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to… — Roseanne Barr
- I'm the whitest guy you will ever meet. The first time I saw an African-American, my dad had to tell me to… — Glenn Beck
- I read a story about some old opera singer once, and when a guy asked her to marry him, she took him… — Janis Joplin