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First Person Quotes by Chelsea Handler

1 First Person quote by Chelsea Handler

Then they have the audacity to go shopping and pick out their own gifts. I want to know who the first person was who said…

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Chelsea Handler has 111 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

First of all, who cares if people hate you? There's always a guarantee that certain people will dislike you. There's never any…
It's been my experience that people who make proclamations about themselves are usually the opposite of what they claim to be. If…
I had an abortion when I was 16. Because that's what I should have done. Otherwise I would now have a 20-year-old…
Sometimes, Chelsea, I wonder, how you get by from day to day. It's a good thing you're so voluptuous.
I'm not that shallow, asshole. I don't need money. It's way more important for them to be good-looking.
Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator, not another…
My whole life is reading tabloid magazines. It’s really sad, because that’s what my show is all about — what is going…
Paris Hilton has launched a new champagne in a can called Rich Prosecco. For the ad campaign Paris posed wearing nothing but…
Paris Hilton is one of the hosts for Nicole Richie’s baby shower, and they’re serving sushi. Awesome, Paris—sushi, the one thing pregnant…
Thanksgiving is coming. I wonder what the holiday will be like at Dog the Bounty Hunter’s house—obviously, they’ll have a turkey with…
A Catholic priest who’s been sending threatening notes to Conan O’Brien was charged with stalking in the fourth degree. It just goes…
Angelina Jolie’s older brother James Haven, the one she made out with, has a license plate on his SUV that reads Shiloh.…

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Popular First Person quotes from across the collection:

The first person to promulgate the Golden Rule, which was the bedrock of this empathic spirituality, was Confucius 500 years before Christ. — Karen Armstrong
Because I write fiction, I don't write autobiography, and to me they are very different things. The first-person narrative is a very… — Kate Atkinson
When you hire that first person, then you're a boss. You've got performance reviews. You've got complaints about not making enough money.… — Scott Adams
A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains… — Ambrose Bierce
If I ever woke up with a dead hooker in my hotel room, Matt would be the first person I'd call. — Ben Affleck
I'm not an impersonator. I've only got one voice and only do one guy and his first-person essays. — Tom Bodett
I am not the first person to give birth naturally. Billions of other women have come before me and have done this… — Gisele Bundchen
Growing up, I mostly read comic books and sci-fi. Then I discovered the book 'Jane Eyre' by Jane Austen. It introduced me… — Meg Cabot
Don't be fearful about the journey ahead; don't worry about where you are going or how you are going to get there.… — Edith Schaeffer
There is only one solitude, and it is vast, heavy, difficult to bear, and almost everyone has hours when he would gladly… — Rainer Maria Rilke
Yoga began with the first person wanting to be healthy and happy all the time. — Swami Satchidananda
A player who conjugates a verb in the first person singular cannot be part of the squad, he has to conjugate the… — Unknown Author

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