"Paris Hilton is one of the hosts for……" — Chelsea Handler
"Paris Hilton is one of the hosts for Nicole Richie’s baby shower, and they’re serving sushi. Awesome, Paris—sushi, the one thing pregnant women are forbidden to eat. Thanks for the mercury."
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Chelsea Handler
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107 Quotes by Chelsea Handler
Chelsea Handler has 107 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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First of all, who cares if people hate you? There's always a guarantee that certain people will dislike you. There's…
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It's been my experience that people who make proclamations about themselves are usually the opposite of what they claim to…
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I had an abortion when I was 16. Because that's what I should have done. Otherwise I would now have…
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Sometimes, Chelsea, I wonder, how you get by from day to day. It's a good thing you're so voluptuous.
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I'm not that shallow, asshole. I don't need money. It's way more important for them to be good-looking.
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Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator,…
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My whole life is reading tabloid magazines. It’s really sad, because that’s what my show is all about — what…
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Paris Hilton has launched a new champagne in a can called Rich Prosecco. For the ad campaign Paris posed wearing…
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Thanksgiving is coming. I wonder what the holiday will be like at Dog the Bounty Hunter’s house—obviously, they’ll have a…
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A Catholic priest who’s been sending threatening notes to Conan O’Brien was charged with stalking in the fourth degree. It…
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Angelina Jolie’s older brother James Haven, the one she made out with, has a license plate on his SUV that…
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Christina Aguilera finally announced her pregnancy. Thanks for waiting until your third trimester to get the word out—why not just…
See all 107 quotes by Chelsea Handler »
More Awesome Quotes
This quote is filed under Awesome Quotes,
one of 1,258 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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Anybody can win - unless there happens to be a second entry.
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Arafat's departure has created an awesome opportunity.
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First of all, let me say, 1:15 in the morning, for 20,000 people to still be here, I wasn't the…
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A woodland in full color is awesome as a forest fire, in magnitude at least, but a single tree is…
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Anytime you have a fellow artist say, 'Loving the new Luke Bryan album,' that's awesome.
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When actresses jump on the anti-Iraq bandwagon, they often combine down-home momism with an ignorance of Islamist intent which is…
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my…
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God gives me the children's ministry heart and patience. This is what He wants. It's awesome. I don't know where…
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It is possible to become discouraged about the injustice we see everywhere. But God did not promise us that the…
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I've dated a couple of guys who were awesome, and the celebrity part of my life and the traveling part…
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The number one thing I am earnestly attracted to is intelligence. Writers are thus the pinnacle of intelligence. While actors…
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When I'm feeling sad, or lonely, and I don't know what I'm doing and I don't know where I'm going,…
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