I could lose so much weight if I just switched to red wine from eight beers. — Green Monk Beers Copy Share Image
Girls are like roads, more the curves, more the dangerous they are. — Green Monk Curves Copy Share Image
Don't solve all your problems today. Be sure to avoid or ignore them later! — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Trust is something that you have in a condom when the partner is not your spouse — Green Monk Condom Copy Share Image
Set Your Goals High Enough To Inspire You And Low Enough To Encourage You — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
When someone let you go first and said, ladies first, say bitches follow — Green Monk Bitches Copy Share Image
That awkard moment ,while a lunch with important people,Suddenly,you drop coke on your new clothes -.- — Green Monk Coke Copy Share Image
Average women believe they need a man to feel wanted & loved. Real women are very desired, have self-love, & do just… — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
I love a woman who knows how beautiful she is, but doesn't let it change her attitude towards the world. — Green Monk Attitude Copy Share Image
Listen closely when your kiddo tell you their dreams. Just puke on them when they laugh. — Green Monk Dreams Copy Share Image
When someone says: 'Expect the unexpected.' Slap their face and say: 'You didn't expect that, did you?' — Green Monk Expect Copy Share Image
I bet in Africa they play commercials of American stripper girls starving for their father's attention. — Green Monk Africa Copy Share Image
Two whales walked into a bar. One said, Weeeeeeeee-ooooooooo-uuuuuuuuuu-hhhh. The other whale said, Shut up, Steve. You're drunk! — Green Monk Drunk Copy Share Image
Number one rule: Never get attached to something that wasn't yours in the first place. — Green Monk Attached Copy Share Image
I'm so handsome that every time I shop, the cashiers check me out! — Green Monk Cashiers Copy Share Image
A real man ends a relationship before he starts searching for another one. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Passion is a strong emotional desire of love and hate to humans or objects — Green Monk Desire Copy Share Image
Everything is made in China... Except babies... They're made in the VaChina... — Green Monk Babies Copy Share Image
The first woman who decided that tights are pants should get the Nobel Peace Prize. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
If all else fails, get in bed at 8:00pm and watch a bunch of shit on tv. — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Sometimes you have to talk quieter , To see who's really listening .. ¥ — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
Lying about my age is easier now that I sometimes forget what it is. — Green Monk Age Copy Share Image
To those who know and love me I wish you well. All the rest may go to hell — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
I went to an emotional wedding last week. Even the cake was in tiers! — Green Monk Funny Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you see someone coming your way after you've just farted. — Green Monk Awkward Copy Share Image
Nah, we're cool! Just make sure you remind me how awesome I am 3 times a day. — Green Monk Cool Copy Share Image
The only possible way I would find you attractive is if you swallowed a magnet. — Green Monk Attractive Copy Share Image
