Abusive Quote by Anthony Jeselnik

“Yeah we're not together anymore. She has got - she has got a new boyfriend now. They just moved into together. And I've heard rumors that he is abusive, which makes you want to go over there with a baseball bat. And then blame it on her boyfriend.”

Anthony Jeselnik

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Abusive Baseball Bats Blame Heard Moved New boyfriend Rumor Together Want Yeah

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I have a twelve year old sex doll. Brand new.

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Father's Day makes me wish I could talk to my Dad just one more time, instead of all the time.

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About a year after I moved to Los Angeles, I decided I wanted to be a joke writer for a late night talk show.…

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When I was little, I would burn ants with a magnifying glass. But now that I'm older, I'm more of a cat guy.

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I'm fascinated by offensive subject matter. Always have been. It is very natural to me, as any teach I've ever had growing up could…

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I got into comedy because I wanted to get into writing.

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I actually never acted on "Deadwood." I have meetings all the time where people look at my IMDb page and see that I played…

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I was a weird kid because I liked to be alone, but I craved attention. It was important for me to be cool, but…

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I know her in the biblical senseand when I say that, I mean I don't believe a word she says.

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Explore all 204 Anthony Jeselnik quotes

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