...and suddenly it hits you: Human skin is actually made up of billions of tiny units of protoplasm, called "cells"! And what… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Although humans tend to view sex as mainly a fun recreational activity sometimes resulting in death, in nature it is a far… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I tell people view the federal government as a source of entertainment. It's a lot easier. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
You should definitely visit the Louvre, a world-famous art museum where you can view, at close range, the backs of thousands of… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
To people who make moving ads that block the view of websites: Not only will we not buy from you, but we… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Avoid the traffic by using one of the park's shuttle buses and view the elk rut with a park ranger. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I don't like anything unsigned in a newspaper that purports to be the opinion of some group if we don't know who… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
It is important to be nice. But sometimes niceness can be misconstrued as weak. Should we be nice to everybody? Should we… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Chair lifts need to be in some places so that we can get to wonderful views without having to hike to them. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Nobody is excused from the excellence trend. Babies are not excused. Starting right after they get out of the womb, modern babies… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Most married couples, even though they love each other very much in theory, tend to view each other in practice as large… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
