Whenever you go out to eat you gotta get the appetizer. 'Cause the appetizer's just an excuse for an extra meal. You're… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
The entertainment business is such a strange, crazy perception business that you're either given way too much respect, like people saying, "You… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I've stayed in so many hotel rooms that I'm shocked if, when I stay in a hotel room, the hotel phone isn't… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I think comedians get too much credit or too much criticism for the style of comedy they do, and they generally do… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I spend way too much time on Facebook and MySpace to feel too uncomfortable at this. I like to think of the… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
No one goes into standup to make money. The frustration and rejection are just too much. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
You ever find yourself being lazy for no reason at all? Like, you pick up your mail, you go in your house,… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
Stand-up comedy in the end, unlike the rest of the entertainment industry, is a meritocracy. There's a certain level of undeniability you can work… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I think growing up in Indiana prepares anyone for a life in comedy. I do feel like there is a certain kind of self-effacing… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
Besides hot pockets keeps introducing new products every 10 minutes so I always have new stuff on the topic. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
“The song goes, “Morning has broken,” and I’m pretty sure my children broke it. Like everything else they break, if they did break it,… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I am single, I don't drink. It's kind of hard to get a woman buzzed when you don't drink. You'll be like, "Yeah, I'll… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
Babies and toddlers are mostly what I've been exposed to at this point. I'm hoping parenting just gets much easier after this. It does,… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
Isn't it strange -- when you're single, all you see is couples, and when you're part of a couple, all you see are hookers. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I usually don't have a burger, a brat, and a steak but it is 4th of July. And I need the energy if I'm… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
“If you complain about how you spend your Saturdays taking your kid to birthday parties, that means you are taking your kid to birthday… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I believe that comedians do what they do, and then they get credit or criticism for doing it. There's nothing planned about this. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
![“I think comedians get too much credit or too much criticism for the style of comedy they do, and they generally do the style of comedy that works for them. [...] There's no kind of shrewd calculation going into the type of standup we all do. It's like David Cross is supposed to be doing the David…” quote by Jim Gaffigan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/181/jim-gaffigan-580_calculations_i-think-comedians-get-too-much-credit-or_2220899.jpg)
