At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In the past a man was expected to give his seat on a bus to a woman. Today it would be much… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I spent a lot of time behind the Iron Curtain, and their cars were abysmal. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
You can't destroy America by destroying our elite. Think about America's elite. Think about it down through history. Destroy our elite, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Like most sensible people, you probably lost interest in modern art about the time that Julian Schnabel was painting broken pieces of… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I'm 61 years old. I'm not that fearful of the future, period. I'm not going to see that much of it. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Fashionably amusing table manners are a matter of breaking the right rule at the right time. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In Israel, waves of anger and fear circulate all the time, but so do jokes and gossip and silky evening breezes. So,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Supposedly, summer vacation happens because that's when the kids are home from school, although having the kids home from school is no… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Visiting Future World is like opening a Chinese fortune cookie to read, "Soon you'll be finished with dinner." — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I was never in the office [of Rolling Stone]. It was very different from Lampoon, where we spent a lot of time… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Modern air travel means less time spent in transit. That time is now spent in transit lounges. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Tel Aviv is new, built on the sand dunes north of Jaffa in the 1890s, about the same time Miami was founded.… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I think in the [Bill] Clinton era, if people hadn't been spending vast amounts of time attacking Clinton, they would have found… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Smoking is very bad for you and should only be done because it looks so good. People who don't smoke have a… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The only time a bachelor's bed is made is when it's in the factory. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Think about last time you were broke ... now how well did it go with spending your way out of it? Did… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Any person who has spent time outdoors actually doing something, such as hunting and fishing as opposed to standing there with a… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The most brilliant satire of all time was 'A Modest Proposal' by Jonathan Swift. You'll notice how everything got straightened out in… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Nothing about economic growth in the United States over the course of the past 40, 50 years, during which time this has… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In general, life is better than it has ever been, and if you think that, in the past, there was some golden… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I like fiction and the kind of history that gives the grace and flavor of fiction to the past. No bloviation on… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In comparative terms, there's no poverty in America by a long shot. Heritage Foundation political scientist Robert Rector has worked up figures showing that… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The Democrats said, "We don't know what's wrong with America, but we can fix it." The Republicans said, "There's nothing wrong with America, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and the annoying… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
So-called Western Civilization, as practised in half of Europe, some of Asia and a few parts of North America, is better than anything else… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
My whole family can talk. They are all car salesmen. They are all funny. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
It was Ronald Reagan who used to say that the 10 most frightening words in the English language are, "I'm from the federal government,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Gun violence has cost us too many political leaders, and hardly ever the worst ones. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Pete Seeger is a modest, unassuming, cheerful, and kind-natured man. He's a good folk singer, if you can stand folk singing. And he's such… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
![“I was never in the office [of Rolling Stone]. It was very different from Lampoon, where we spent a lot of time together socially, which is to say "drunk."” quote by P. J. O'Rourke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/86a/p-j-o-rourke-184_different_i-was-never-in-the-office-of-rolling-sto_1215458.jpg)
![“I think in the [Bill] Clinton era, if people hadn't been spending vast amounts of time attacking Clinton, they would have found that they had essentially the same problems as they do now.” quote by P. J. O'Rourke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/346/p-j-o-rourke-184_amount_i-think-in-the-bill-clinton-era-if-peopl_1906545.jpg)
