Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I can't sing. Never been able to sing. I can't do voices very well. Every impression I do sounds the same. I… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
As our larynxes descended, we were able to make sounds with our mouths in new and far more expressive ways. Verbal language… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Everything in Italian sounds like 'Give me your money or I'm going to beat your @$$'. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
So if you're negative, you live longer? That sounds like a cruel joke. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
[He died of thirst?] That sounds, if I might say, like the greatest Sprite commercial ever. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Trent Lott has regained a position of leadership. He was the former majority leader who lost his post for racially insensitive commentary.… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Please explain to me why John Kerry sounds more dickish telling the truth than Bush sounds when he's lying. How is that… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't know how people feel,that's the beauty of TV, is they can see us, but we can't see them. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I reject the idea there are just two sides. I think that with the amount of ideas and thoughts there are, it's not even… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
While opponents label (Howard) Dean a throwback liberal, The New York Times recently noted that as governor, Dean cut income taxes, reformed welfare and… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You know, in Saudi Arabia, you're innocent until proven Jewish. Female. Guilty! They're guilty! — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is an elective. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Do you guys have to sell everything? I'd like to buy the Earth's core. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates the use of 's.'… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
![“[He died of thirst?] That sounds, if I might say, like the greatest Sprite commercial ever.” quote by Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/b4f/jon-stewart-455_died_he-died-of-thirst-that-sounds-if-i-might_1681403.jpg)
