Science is a bit like the joke about the drunk who is looking under a lamppost for a key that he has… — Noam Chomsky Copy Share Image
To joke in the face of danger is the supreme politeness, a delicate refusal to cast oneself as a tragic hero. — Edmond Rostand Copy Share Image
High school wasn't a trial by fire or some ordeal that had to be survived. It was all a big joke. You… — Scott Westerfeld Copy Share Image
It's harder when people are playing along, because it's just not as funny. They're trying to be funny, and it sort of… — Steve Carell Copy Share Image
I learned as a young man that I don't write jokes, but that I can deliver more mundane material and get a… — Nick Offerman Copy Share Image
No matter how sad, no matter how sick, I feel better just thinking of you... But I'm happier each time I send… — Superman Copy Share Image
I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
People try to put ownership on things: 'That's mine, that's my joke.' No such thing. Like if you tripped or stumbled and… — Tommy Chong Copy Share Image
It's a great historical joke that when the Spanish met the Aztecs, it was a blind date made in serve-you-right heaven. At… — A. A. Gill Copy Share Image
I have a really analytical approach to art. And the whole idea that you can't analyze what makes a joke funny...I do… — David Rees Copy Share Image
It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking to the president, because what if he… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
In all of Western civilization, there have been societies that celebrating the homosexuality, the ancient Greeks. But they, in fact, protected the… — Ken Blackwell Copy Share Image
We used to get 27, 28 minutes to do a story in, and now they're lucky if they get 18 or 20… — Dick Van Dyke Copy Share Image
And the bigger the fall, the bigger the joke. It would be better fun to throw a custard pie at a bishop… — George Orwell Copy Share Image
I wish I lived back in the Old West days, because I'd save up my money for about twenty years so I… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
“Here is a good joke. The little boy walks into an ice cream store, He asks for a sundae with extra hot… — Susan Magsamen Copy Share Image
I always joke and say I want to invent a comfortable stiletto and then retire. — Sara Blakely Copy Share Image
Crusaders have just f-ked me over what a bas-rd joke, excuse my language I'm absolutely furious. — Keith Senior Copy Share Image
Plato was only a Bernard Shaw who unfortunately made his jokes in Greek. — Gilbert K. Chesterton Copy Share Image
It's not like we have a formula, but I think one of the reasons this show has survived is that it has… — Trey Parker Copy Share Image
What am I doing with my life am I living it or am I just going to some hum drum job that… — Kai Greene Copy Share Image
