Be not affronted at a joke. If one throw salt at thee, thou wilt receive no harm, unless thou art raw. — Oliver Goldsmith Copy Share Image
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move. — Jokes About Chuck Norris Copy Share Image
I mean, this is a joke, to try to implicate me as like a friend of the Russians. — Jill Stein Copy Share Image
If you put your finger in your ear, and scratch it, it sounds just like pac man :) — Ricardo Alexandre Copy Share Image
I never used to tell jokes on stage. Now I'm cutting up jokes all night long. — Robin Thicke Copy Share Image
Surrealism is anathema for me. Because the surrealists made a joke of everything. And I consider life a tragedy. — Louise Bourgeois Copy Share Image
God gave us the miracle of life - sustaining water, & we turned it into Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi & Vodka. Good job, Morons. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When my syndicated show got canceled, the next day I still knew how to write jokes. That was a huge revelation. Because… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I used to always crack jokes in class. I was a good liar and a good talker. I was just good. I… — Drake Copy Share Image
In the end, perhaps we should simply imagine a joke; a long joke that's continually retold in an accent too thick and… — Tom Robbins Copy Share Image
I can pretty much guarantee that if I do a show in a comedy club, there will be someone who will come… — Lewis Black Copy Share Image
One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, Please send me a sister. Santa Clause wrote him back, Ok, send me… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
All the truly great stand-ups say, 'I go onstage, and I work on jokes. The inspiration will happen while I'm doing my… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
Are my characters copies of people in real life? ... Don't ever believe the stories about authors putting people into novels. That… — Ayn Rand Copy Share Image
No matter what I face, I must have a mindset that 'it must go this way.' Although it gets to the point… — Yunho Copy Share Image
In the sixties, the recycling of pop culture turning it into Pop art and camp had its own satirical zest. Now we're… — Pauline Kael Copy Share Image
I don't get the animosity when someone tells a joke that you don't like. Whereas if someone made a dish that you… — Brad Williams Copy Share Image
In a weird way, it's not different from any other kind of joke-telling. You make those calculations about jokes about celebrities: is… — Michael Schur Copy Share Image
That family glaze of common references, jokes, events, calamities-that sense of a family being like a kitchen midden: layer upon layer of… — Laurie Colwin Copy Share Image
There's that great Irish joke: a man is lost in the countryside, stops a passer-by: 'how do I get to Dublin?'. The… — Tim Crane Copy Share Image
Surprisingly, a large number of people who fell out with their partners contacted us, saying that they would love to fly on… — Richard Branson Copy Share Image
![“Surprisingly, a large number of people who fell out with their partners contacted us, saying that they would love to fly on a Virgle spaceship. But out of April Fools' jokes come real things, and I wouldn't be surprised, within the next 50 years, [if] there are one-way trips heading out into space…” quote by Richard Branson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/e41/richard-branson-256_april_surprisingly-a-large-number-of-people-wh_3009694.jpg)
