Comedian Quotes · Page 32

My daughter Fathima is a bigger comedian than me. She makes me laugh all the time.

— Ali

Growing up as a comedian, the first thing you dream of is having your own album, but even more than that, I…

— Christian Finnegan

Comedians usually are rooting for the underdog. I mean to take a shot at an underdog I think is really stupid and…

— Joy Behar

You can't hold me to the same standard as the president or a school teacher. I'm just a comedian. My job is…

— Tracy Morgan

Lots of people say if you dredge too much stuff up, you'll go crazy - "You'll go insane!" But for a comedian,…

— Jim Carrey

Using blasphemy as entertainment is as cheap as a comedian telling a fart joke.

— Katy Perry

Being a comedian is like being a con man. You have to make 'em like you before you can fool 'em.

— Flip Wilson

I'm an entertainer, not a commentator. If you're a comedian your job is to make people laugh.

— Johnny Carson

I always wanted to be a comedian and actor. I basically stumbled into the music medium, though. I'm OK, but that's about…

— Bo Burnham

Anybody with a sharp brain and a mic can become a comedian, but there's a need to move beyond it. The audience…

— Vir Das

I've never set out to write a funny movie or be a funny comedian as a woman. I am a woman. I…

— Maya Rudolph

There's many hundreds of millions of people who have jobs harder than comedians. And I also remind myself of that everyday. No…

— Chris Gethard

I don't know if people really care about my opinion on things or how I come up with things, and maybe that's…

— Nick Thune

I would be so mad if I saw something called a memoir, and then it was Mike Birbiglia. It would be so…

— Mike Birbiglia

Some people assume that I'm a stand-up comedian - I couldn't think of anything worse - and then they ask 'would you…

— Joanna Page

I'm very much a stand-up comedian in my heart. That's really what I do. Now I'm trying to incorporate all of the…

— Margaret Cho

There is nothing quite as loud as the silence of an audience when a comedian is on stage.

— Dominic Holland

If there's anything I like better than honey and ketchup, it's baloney and whipped cream --- and we haven't got any!

— Moe Howard

There's something about being a comedian that means you have to not be scared of failing because failing is part of the…

— David Walliams

Every week Republicans are excited about a new candidate because the one they liked last week turned out to be a moron.

— Andy Borowitz

If you like standup and decide that it's overtaking your life and want to hate it, watch 1,000 standup comedians who are…

— Adam DeVine

Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are…

— Yakov Smirnoff

I'm not a comedian, but I love the comedians who know when to get off the stage.

— Topher Grace

I think the term 'Twitter comedian' can seem like a pejorative because it's not a job, really, and there's such a low…

— Josh Gondelman

I would have liked to be a comedian in the '20s, or maybe even a comedian on the Mayflower and have a…

— Dani Levy

The ones who constantly make us laugh are the hardest of friends to know - for comedians are the caricatures among us.

— Criss Jami

Any comedian who tells you how dark and dangerous they are, they're not dark and dangerous.

— Patton Oswalt

You have to go away to come back. That's just normal. That's with bands, actors, comedians, everything.

— Pauly Shore

I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book.

— Greg Behrendt

Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity.

— Jim Butcher

My dad loved comedians, especially George Jessel, and he loved Henny Youngman and Buddy Hackett.

— Al Franken

Maybe if I could ever be a successful comedian then I could be an example that Christians can also have fun.

— Victoria Jackson

I am a comedian. I do feel I have to put my experience on a public stage. As an artist, that's what…

— David Baddiel

I want to show people that there's a side of myself other than just the outrageous comedian.

— Sam Kinison

I'm a liberal arts comedian and the definition of liberal arts is all spheres of human knowledge, coexisting, mixing and influencing each…

— Adam Conover

Part of being a comedian is that it's your job to look at life and regurgitate it in a funny way, to…

— Greg Behrendt

I have fear of the audience and I am responsible for the scenes involving me, be it as a comedian or hero.

— Karunas

Audiences have proved time and again that they don't want a steady diet of any entertainer airing his social views - especially…

— Johnny Carson

As a comedian and satirist you have to be neutral, because everyone's fair game. Once you show bias, you lose that.

— Bill Bailey

Everyone thinks I'm a comedian - which I am and are. I was born into a comedic family but I'm trained as…

— Marlon Wayans