I'm a little bit too obsessed with the news. I find the news easier to follow than narrative entertainment programs. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
When you're accustomed to doing stand-up, so often you're the only person onstage and it's all your thing. It's very gladiatorial. Obviously,… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I'm a bit down. Liza Minelli and David Gest, I don't know how it didn't work out. How can a man who… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Attorney General John Ashcroft bid farewell to the Justice Department with a goodbye address. The voluntary resignation came as a bit of… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Most Americans don't live their lives solely as Democrats or Republicans or conservatives or liberals. Most Americans live their lives that are… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The goals for me have changed somewhat. There's a bit of seduction to the idea of being on network, but it got… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I feel like the only thing that I can do, and I've been fired from enough jobs, that I'm pretty confident in… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I think that, if we do anything in a positive sense for the world, is provide one little bit of context, that's… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't know how people feel,that's the beauty of TV, is they can see us, but we can't see them. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I reject the idea there are just two sides. I think that with the amount of ideas and thoughts there are, it's not even… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
While opponents label (Howard) Dean a throwback liberal, The New York Times recently noted that as governor, Dean cut income taxes, reformed welfare and… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You know, in Saudi Arabia, you're innocent until proven Jewish. Female. Guilty! They're guilty! — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is an elective. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Do you guys have to sell everything? I'd like to buy the Earth's core. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates the use of 's.'… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
