When I have a daughter, I shall name her Stacy. So I will be Stacy's mom thats got it goin' on. :) — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Nutrition facts are useless, just show me how long I have to be at the gym if I eat this. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Whenever you think you're having a bad day, just remember...some people have babies. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You can't always control who walks into your life but you can control which window to throw them out. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm not a superficil, dramatic, makeup caked, bra stuffing, leg spreading, whore. if you cant accept that, you dont deserve me. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Sometimes, when I see a very beautiful person, I just stop for a while and stare until I get tired. Then, I… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Things people say when a movie finishes in the theaters: 5% Awesome movie. 5% that was great acting. 90% I gotta pee! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Hello,I'm the happiness fairy,here to save the day by sprinkling some happy dust on you.Now smile dammit this shit is expensive. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm starting to think that the gym isn't really for me. I went this morning and laid down on the mat to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I put on a sticky note the word SWAG I stuck it on my light switch so every time I get up… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Tell a girl she's BEAUTIFUL in a million times she'll never believe it, tell her she's UGLY ONCE and she'll never forget… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Let's grab lunch with the understanding we'll eat separately at our desks. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Seriously, it's 2012. Can we please get some waterproof phones ? I would like to text in the shower. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Men are like...Mini Skirts. If you're not careful, they'll creep up your legs. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy sure owed me a lot of money.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
We spend so much money on expensive clothes, but the best moments in life are spent without clothes. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Laughing is the best medicine. But laughing for no reason, you need medicine — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I see your face when I am dreaming. That's why I always wake up screaming. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That Awkward Momment WhenSomeone Deletes There Comment So It Looks Like Your Talking To Your Self.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Scientists are trying to figure out how long human can live without a brain. You can tell them your age. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Awkwardly standing there whileyour friends talks to somebody you don't know. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dad, thanks for dating someone older than me during your mid-life crisis. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That terrifiying moment when you have to pee really bad and you can't unbutton your pants. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If barbie isnt a slut then why do people have to buy her boyfriends????? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Before Shaq retired, they should have made him play a game dressed as Kazaam. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
THERES THIS, one person. & there so beautiful. God must have made them perfectly. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back — Anonymous Copy Share
You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.… — Anonymous Copy Share
Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t… — Anonymous Copy Share
“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care… — Anonymous Copy Share
Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,… — Anonymous Copy Share
Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past… — Anonymous Copy Share
Distance is a test of love. many will fail for those who can't withstand it, but for those who can, theres only one answer… — Anonymous Copy Share
The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much. — Anonymous Copy Share
The truth is, of course, that the curtness of the Ten Commandments is an evidence, not of the gloom and narrowness of a religion,… — Anonymous Copy Share
