Ants Quote by Steven Wright

“I used to own an ant farm but had to give it up. I couldn't find tractors small enough to fit it.”

Steven Wright

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Ants Enough Farms Fit Funny Giving Humor Tractors Used

More by Steven Wright

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

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My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she…

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If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked,…

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If I ever had twins, I'd use one for parts.

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Nobody can really compare a relationship in which the victim is 15 years old to one where she's 6. While both criminal, they're very different circumstances.

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I saw a tree fall in the woods, and I didn't hear it.

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It's very intense to be in front of a live audience. It's just an amazing experience. It's dangerous. Everything out there is heightened. The…

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I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 55 miles per hour?'. So I…

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Babies don't need a vacation, but I still see them at the beach... it pisses me off! I'll go over to a little baby…

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“I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room.”

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When I'm on stage, it's really intense. My mind is going a million miles an hour, trying to remember my act, trying to say…

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I don't like politicians, and I don't like politics. I definitely don't want to be associated with any of them.

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Explore all 564 Steven Wright quotes

More Ants quotes

Some people are like ants. Give them a warm day and a piece of ground and they start digging. There the similarity ends. Ants…

Hal Borland

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Great God of the Ants, thou hast granted victory to thy servants. I appoint thee honorary Colonel.

Karel Capek

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Pray look upon the plants and birds, the ants, spiders, and bees, and you will see them all exerting their nature, and busy in…

Marcus Aurelius

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People are like ants: Just a few of them give all the orders. And most of them spend their lives getting squashed.

Lauren Oliver

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“Some people are ants by nature; they have to work, even when it’s useless. Few people have a talent for constructive laziness.”

Robert A. Heinlein

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There's a good case to be made that having fun is a key evolutionary advantage right next to opposable thumbs in terms of importance.…

Raph Koster

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“THE FIGHTERS ARE TINY. INSECTS, REALLY. BUT ANTS CAN SLAY AN ELEPHANT, IF THERE ARE ENOUGH OF THEM. ESPECIALLY ANTS ARMED WITH HIGH-YIELD EXPLOSIVES…

Amie Kaufman