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Breakup Quote by Chelsea Handler

“Hulk Hogan's wife has filed for divorce. This is the…” quote by Chelsea Handler — Download Open image

“Hulk Hogan's wife has filed for divorce. This is the most devastating breakup since Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee. And then Pam Anderson and Kid Rock. And soon, Pam Anderson and Rick Salomon.”

Chelsea Handler

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More by Chelsea Handler

I love people who have such passion for complete nonsense.

Chelsea Handler

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I think the people I talk about are generally so stupid that they don't even know I'm saying bad things about them. I've run…

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At some point during almost every romantic comedy, the female lead suddenly trips and falls, stumbling helplessly over something ridiculous like a leaf, and…

Chelsea Handler

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A federal grand jury is investigating allegations that David Copperfield raped, assaulted and threatened a woman he took to his private island in the…

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It's been my experience that people who make proclamations about themselves are usually the opposite of what they claim to be. If someone is…

Chelsea Handler

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“My mother agreed to aid my abuse of alcohol but only if I promised never to tell my newly converted Mormon sister, whose identity…

Chelsea Handler

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I try to not overthink anything. I don't understand why nipples are nudity. Who cares? Men can show their nipples but if we have…

Chelsea Handler

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Seeing your mother naked is not something you easily recover from. Seeing your mother naked and jumping from one side of a king-sized bed…

Chelsea Handler

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I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker.

Chelsea Handler

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I can remember my first one-night stand like it was yesterday. Well, maybe not the first. Or the second¦ or the fifth. Ill just…

Chelsea Handler

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“It was quite obvious that without severe behavior modification, this boy would grow up to be a serial killer.”

Chelsea Handler

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Why he would agree to install an eight-by-eight-foot fish tank and then not fill it with a single dolphin made me want to burn…

Chelsea Handler

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Explore all 340 Chelsea Handler quotes

More Breakup quotes

After a bad relationship and you think life is over when its far from, pick your self up and show the person who let…

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[attempts to save the relationship on the phone but said the wrong word while talking] It didn't come out right, but I wasn't in…

Paritoshik Sharma

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If you leave someone for another person, don't be surprised if that person leaves you for someone else.

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It's fucking terrifying that no matter how many promises they made, no matter how long you've been together, someone can get up & walk…

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If it's too hard, walk away. There are a million other people out there who won't make you feel bad!

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Learning to trust is hard for many people, especially those who have been through bad break ups and who have experienced heartache from situations…

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It changes you a little bit every time you either break someone's heart or get your heart broken.

Amanda Seyfried

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“Dry your eyes mate, I know you want to make her see how much this pain hurts, but you’ve got to walk away now,…

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You see, at the beginning we weren't fighters. We weren't yellers or throwers, even if we eventually came to be. It would take time…

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Wishing you knew.

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“Feeling addicted to an ex makes letting them go excruciatingly hard even when you rationally want to move on.”

Dr. Cortney Warren

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I take a step back, and let you go. I told you I'm not bulletproof; Now you know.

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